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Book by Toni Herbine-Blank, Donna M. Kerpelman, Martha Sweezy

Intimacy from the Inside Out

Courage and Compassion in Couple Therapy

Couples in distress enter therapy holding two goals that they now experience as mutually exclusive: to feel loved and to feel understood. Toni Herbine-Blank’s powerful new brand of couple therapy, Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO), offers a comprehensive conceptual map for achieving both goals. In a tour de force of elegant case illustrations wrapped around clear instruction, this book shows the IFIO therapist working with the natural subdivisions – or parts – of the human mind in a dyad, guiding and supporting couples to understand how they project childhood injury into current relationships and then, feeling threatened, frustrated and angry, lose track of their underlying needs to feel safe, connected and loved. With a focus on generating internal attachment stability to sustain each partner through the moments when the other is unavailable, couples in IFIO therapy reconnect with their essential needs, change their conversations and learn to make requests that invite rather than threaten in order to get those needs met.

Soft Cover
206 pages
ISBN 9780415708258
Price
$38.00 USD
Reviews
"This book takes a topic of immense complexity—how the two internal systems of a couple collide with each other to produce the rigid patterns that drive them toward dissolution—and in simple, clear language makes it understandable. Along the way, it offers time-tested techniques for helping each partner drop their weapons, focus inside and speak to each other from a different place—the Self. When couples are able to do this, each partner invariably develops new insight and also discovers that speaking from the Self on behalf of (rather than from) both protective and vulnerable parts produces an entirely different response from the partner." Richard C. Schwartz, PhD, LMFT, is a lecturer on psychology at Harvard Medical School, a licensed marriage and family therapist, fellow of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, and creator of the Internal Family Systems model.
Dr. Richard C. Schwartz